Kid Quotes and other Nonsense

We were reading the Book of Mormon and reading about the ball of “curious workmanship.” I asked the boys if anyone knew what it was called. Tanner said, I know! It’s the Mona Lisa!

A few months ago I was substituting in the nursery at church. I was reading books to the kids. There was a fun book with lots of pictures of bugs. The kids in the class were having fun telling me what the bugs were called. Chase was right in the middle of it saying, spider, earwig, centipenis…” Yep, he said centi-penis. There was another mom in the class with me and we looked at each other and laughed. He had no idea that he said it wrong.

One night we had 2 neighbors bring us Christmas treats. I took them to the kitchen and then I left. When I got home my family was eating the cookies and drinking the hot chocolate. Alex told me, "Mom! Someone broke into our house and brought us cookies and hot chocolate!"

Chase loves me. He tells me all the time. He also tells me that he is going to marry me. It does not matter what I say- he is going to marry me. I tell him that I am already married to dad- he doesn’t care. I tell him that when he grows up he will want to marry a girl that is his age. He gets mad and cries- “I want to marry YOU”. Ahhh, he is sweet.

So… a couple of weeks ago Chase was too tired. He had stayed up late for a few nights in a row and he had not taken any naps. He was fighting me on going to bed. He insisted that he was not tired (as he was bawling his little eyes out). Finally he was sooo mad at me that he said that I was not going to be his mom anymore…. AND he was NOT going to marry me.

Chase wanted to watch “Word Girl” It’s a PBS show about a super hero girl that fights bad guys with her large vocabulary. It is cute. Chase said, “I want to watch Word Girl because that is how I know how to save the day. Because I wasn’t a secret agent, but now I am. And now I need to save the world.” That is good to know.

I was brushing my teeth and Chase came in. “Mom, you have never worn that color.” I was wearing an orange shirt that I found in my closet and I probably hadn’t worn it for a year or so. I told him that it was orange and that it was fun to wear new things. He said, “But prisoners wear that color.” I about choked on my toothpaste laughing. How does he even know these things?

I had just finished washing my hair and not done anything with it. Chase came in and said, “Um, make sure your hair doesn’t look like… um, a crazy person.” Then he left. Thanks.

I told the kids that I was going to take a shower. I told Tanner that he was in charge. I asked him what that meant. He said, “Take care of the little boys”. I said- “Yep, mostly just make sure they are safe”. Then Alex said, “We know how to be safe. We watch Rescue Heroes. If there is a Tornado, you put your hands on your head like this and get down on the floor like this.” –That was not really what I was worried about.

Super bowl. We really never watch football. OK, Andre and I watch BYU and Utah football now that we have cable- but for years we couldn’t watch anything unless we went to someone else’s house. So in truth- the kids never watch football. OK, we watch the BYU-Utah game, but the kids don’t watch the whole thing.

Anyway, we started making the Super bowl a fun activity a few years ago because I thought our boys would WANT to watch football. It turns out that we have to teach them that too (weird). ANYWAY…. we watched the game yesterday and the kids were super excited. We all picked who we were going to cheer for. Andre was going to go for the Giants. He always picks the underdog if he does not care who wins. Jaxon picked the Patriots. I picked the Patriots because I wanted to be on the same side as Jaxon. I swear he likes to cheer against me- just for fun. Tanner picked Patriots and Alex and Chase picked Giants. So that was great, 3 on 3- it makes it fun. The kids gave Streak (the pet rat) a grape and a slice of orange. If she ate the grape first then she would go for the giants. If she ate the orange first she would go for the Patriots. She ate the orange- which tells us… that the orange was closer.

Then the game started. For some unknown reason, Alex and Chase switched to the Patriots. Joanna thought that Tom Brady was cuter then Eli Manning so she was going for the Patriots (We are highly scientific around here.) So that meant everyone wanted the Patriots except Andre. Then we found out that the Patriots were wearing BLUE and the Giants were white and RED. I teased Jaxon that he had to cheer for a BLUE team. (He won’t even wear blue to school because someone will think he likes BYU.) So instantly Jaxon changed teams and was going for the Giants. After the first few plays and the Giants were winning. Alex (going for Patriots) came in and asked who was winning. We told him and he instantly raised his hand and said, “Changing!” Such "fair weather fans” we are. It was actually a fun game to watch. Guess who watch the last part of the game? Andre, Janelle and Joanna- the rest of the family was off doing their own thing. I guess 4 hours was too long for them.